Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
