im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
