Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize