I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Drake has all the answers
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize