I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
