i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
