the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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