But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She's JV to your varsity
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
What drink are we having for lunch?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
