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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.

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• (516): View more from New York

  I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.

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