I seem to have left my pride at pride
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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