yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize