She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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