It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
