the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
