alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
