She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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