i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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