'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
