everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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