i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
