you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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