He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
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