Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
