Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize