Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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