Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
