Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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