I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
