BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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