i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
