She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
