Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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