Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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