Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
