Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
