I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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