He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Is it penis luge time yet?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize