Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
