I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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