Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
But break dance skills will only take you so far
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize