Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
