It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just found puke in my bra..
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
