i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
