Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
