I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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