dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
