I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize