Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
