I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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