"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
