Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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