i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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