okay pat passed out under dana's car
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
