Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
The adults are the big ones right?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
